Phyllis George

I read this evening where Phyllis George has passed away at the age of 70. She was Miss America 1971 and that night is one that I will never forget. 

Before the pageant, my brother had gone to the refrigerator to get a drink for my mama. Unable to wrest it from the plastic ring that held the 6 pack together, he got some scissors. Sparing my readers the details, he injured his eye and lost all vision in it at the age of 9. 

Of course, chaos ensued. My brother was rushed to the emergency room and neighbors came to pick up my sister and me. In an attempt to keep us from worrying (I was 10 and Tammy was 8) our friends tuned into the pageant and we all began to watch. Phyllis George was a favorite from the beginning. Her charm and personality overcame a very weak piano rendition of "Raindrops Keep Fallin' on my Head" to help her become Miss America that year. As she took her triumphant walk, her crown fell off of her head. She bent down, picked it up, and just kept going. 

And so did my brother. 

Spoiled

I will be the first to admit that Amazon Prime has spoiled me. I do shop small businesses here in town, but some things I can only get by mail order. I got way too used to that speedy delivery, although I often traded some of that speed for credits towards e-books for my Kindle. Even then, I usually received things within a week.

Enter COVID-19. Speedy shipping is not always guaranteed due to necessities taking precedence. I am OK with that. I want medical supplies and masks to get to those who need them. I can wait on my craft supplies, print books, and kitchen things. But, when it took 3 weeks to get my printer ink (Office Max seldom has the high yield black cartridge for my Epson Workforce printer) it got a little dicey. I was watching those ink levels daily, saving print jobs for the things that were absolutely necessary. I was also almost out of paper, but it was actually delivered within 3 days. Go figure. 

If this virus has taught me anything it is that I am privileged beyond belief. It has taught me to conserve resources more carefully. To be extra thankful for those who work to get me the things I don't just need, but want. 

I almost did a happy dance when those ink cartridges arrived. But, I decided against it. 

I didn't want to add the cost of a visit to the ER to the already hideously expensive ink! 

Jane

I have often heard the expression, "When God made _____, He broke the mold." Never has that expression been more true than in the case of my friend Jane. 

I did not meet Jane until just a few years ago, when I was introduced to her by a mutual friend while we were at one of the Metropolitan Opera Simulcasts at Tinseltown. If I recall correctly, the opera was Madame Butterfly and it was a lovely production. 

Jane and I ended up in a book club together and that is where we really bonded. Jane reminded me a lot of my mother, who passed away in 1990. Jane said what she thought and would try anything...at least once. As someone who tends to worry about what others think, Jane's fearlessness was fun to be around. 

I am going to miss picking her up for political meetings and smoothies at the Coffee House Cafe. I am going to miss her love and acceptance of me. She loved me for me and not just for what I could do for her. The older I get, the more precious that has become. 

Jane passed away on March 20th and I still can't quite wrap my head around the fact that she is gone. I see things every day that I want to share with her and it is all I can do not to post something that would have tickled her to her Facebook wall. 

Due to the COVID-19 restrictions, a proper memorial could not be held and that makes grieving more complicated. I hope to be at least be able to raise a socially distant glass with her son and daughter before too terribly long. 

Rest in peace, Jane. 

Cheers. 

The Graduate: Bryan Edition

My young nephew has just graduated Magna Cum Laude from Mississippi State University with his  Master's Degree in Electrical/Computer Engineering. 

There is a running joke in our family that if Bryan had been the first born, he would have been an only child. He was a sweet, shy child, but boy was he stubborn! His parents and grandmother had to practically sit on him to get him to do his homework. I worried about what would happen to him when he got to college and did not have "Granna" to make him study! He used to joke that he was taking her with him! 

Fortunately, well before that, this bright kid got serious about his studies, graduating in the top ten in his class at Clinton High School. And, when he got to MSU, he followed in his Papaw Nelson's footsteps by majoring in Engineering. 

To say I am proud of this kid is an understatement. He has overcome a reading disorder by finding ways to learn that work for him. Over the past year or so, he has taken charge of his health, changing his eating habits, and exercising regularly while taking graduate courses and working as a graduate research assistant. He interviewed for 4 jobs on a Friday and had offers from 3 of them by the next Monday. He will be moving to Huntsville, AL in the next few weeks to start working for Dynetics, an applied science and information tech company. 

For those parents who are pulling their hair out dealing with stubborn kids, take heart. Those things that drive parents insane when kids are little can be the very things that ensure success when they are older.

Hang in there. 

Opening Up?

Look, I get it. I realize that we cannot stay shut down forever. People are ready to get back into their normal routines. And, for some, this is completely worth risking their own lives and the lives of others. 

But, can we do this with some degree of care? Would it really be so bad to have places limit the number of people inside for a while? I, for one, would love to see restaurant tables spaced out enough not to be able to hear every word of the conversation at the next table! 

I am also aware that we vulnerable folks are going to have to be careful for the foreseeable future no matter what the government decides. I will be the one still wearing a mask, washing my hands more often, avoiding crowds, and not shaking hands for some time to come. I will not mind having my temperature taken before I enter a medical facility. And I am fine doing business through windows for a while. 

Another thing I am hoping will happen after "reopening" is that stores might consider continuing "senior hours" at least one day a week. This virus is not just going to go away and this gesture would be appreciated by those of us who qualify. I can also see more employment opportunities for Instacart and other pickup service workers. 

If those of us who have a steady income can help our friends and neighbors who are out of work right now, we might be able to obtain that balance between safety and the economy. 

It's worth a try. 

Expendable?

Expendable: of little significance when compared to an overall purpose, and therefore able to be abandoned. 

As the regulations on gatherings and essential businesses go on, I know that a lot of people are itching for an immediate return back to business as usual. I get it. I do. There are a lot of people out of work who were already living paycheck to paycheck. 

I was reading the comments under one such post this afternoon. One person said that "This is America! Survival of the fittest!" I know other people are thinking that, even if they are not saying it out loud. 

I read respected local medical professionals opinions about the need to continue safety practices for a while longer. Our relatively small hospital has been known to get overwhelmed in a bad flu year, let alone one where a much larger group of people could require intensive medical resources in a very short time. 

Believe me, I am all about a return to some semblance of normal. But does it have to be immediate and does it have to happen all at once? As a fairly high risk person, I have a feeling that my life will not be going back to my previous normal any time soon. I see masks, gloves, and some degree of social distancing in my life for the foreseeable future. Being that higher risk asthmatic, immunosuppressed, over 60 person with a neuromuscular disorder, I tend to shy away from crowds or anyone who is obviously ill anyway. 

Are there alternatives to just throwing the vulnerable to the wolves? My Christian faith seems to make a case that the ill and elderly are cherished children of God and worthy of being treated as such. 

Today it really hit me that in many people's eyes, I am expendable. People like me are nothing compared to the economy and the convenience of the healthy. In the grand scheme of things, I don't matter. And that hurts. 

I think I still have at least something to offer this world. 

I just hope I get the time to do it. 

A Strange Easter

This morning, I awoke to a very different Easter. 

First of all, I decadently slept till after 6 AM. This would not happen on a normal Easter at Hermanville United Methodist Church. There was not an Easter card from my husband on the kitchen table this year. I'm sure he knew that I would have his head if he had gone anywhere and lingered long enough to look at cards. His chocolate bunny is pitifully small this year, but it was the only one I could quickly find while in a local Dollar General (to which I will not be going back anytime soon!) replacing my broken tea pitcher, which IS an essential item in my house. 

I will not be eating Easter lunch at Granna's with my family. It will be lunch for two with just my husband and me. I did spend much of yesterday cooking what is pretty close to a normal Easter lunch with the items I was able to have delivered by Instacart and could find at Honeybaked Ham. We will have stuffed eggs and candied yams. Because of the possibility of inclement weather today, I made plates for Granna and some other elderly friends and delivered them yesterday. I know that they will especially miss being with their families this year. I want everyone to have at least a little taste of "Easter food." 

Instead of a live church service, I will watch a local service on Facebook. I will sing along with hymns, even if my husband looks at me funny. And I WILL celebrate the risen Christ regardless of the current circumstances. Easter has been distilled to its essence. That is not a bad thing. 

Happy Easter! 

Art Supplies

During this COVID-19 crisis, I have been trying not to order "non-essential" things from Amazon. I want the workers to be focusing on things like getting essential supplies where they need to be. I order some of my necessary supplements and medical supplies from them, so I want those to be a priority. 

However, I also need to stay sane and feel like I am contributing something during this crisis. I am doing this by making sure a 90-year-old friend has the things she needs, and by making cards for my friends who are currently confined not just to nursing homes, but also confined to their rooms. No visitors. No activities. No socializing even with each other in some cases. Having been in nursing homes to rehab hip replacements, this would have been nothing short of Hell for me. 

So, when my paper cutter blade went dull and I ran out of tape runner and pretty printed paper, I debated whether is was right to order replacements for these things so I could continue making cards. After a day or so of inner debate, I finally decided to make my order. In my case, right now, art supplies are as essential as just about anything else. I am not a TV watcher. I can only read for so long before my eyes give out. I have to take Social media breaks for my own sanity. But, I can make cards as long as my hands will let me. And they are something tangible that might bring a smile to someone's face. I hope those wonderful workers at Amazon didn't mind packing my art supplies too much. 

I have seen several posts dubbed #covidcrafts.

 I guess I'm not the only one. 

Manners in the time of Corona

I am one of those people who, even in the best of times, needs personal space. I can't stand having anyone right on me and I avoid crowds for that reason. I also avoid crowds, even in the best of times, because I am immunosuppressed. 

Of course, now, the need for social distancing is making this even more crucial. I go out very sparingly and only for food, medicine, and physical therapy (in a carefully controlled environment). I also try to take food every few days to a 90 year old friend who does not have any family nearby and who does not need to get our for any reason. 

Today, I was trying to help out a local business by getting takeout from one of our awesome Vicksburg restaurants. As I drove up, a car pulled up beside me with 4 men in it who were obviously coming from a workplace. I could tell that they were NOT practicing social distancing. I came in before them (I had already called in my order) and took a seat in the corner as far away from these men as possible. However, one of them was determined to stand way too close to me. It would have been too close even if we were not dealing with COVID-19. I politely asked him if he would mind moving away from me because I was high risk. 

The man became annoyed and walked out of the restaurant. I got a "look" from the person at the counter as she tried to get him to come back in. I did not think I was being unreasonable to ask for proper space. 

I learned my lesson and will not go to any place that does not offer curb service or drive-through for the duration. 

How would you handle this situation? Suggestions welcome! 

Getting Real

I got up before daylight this morning to make a quick trip to Corner Market. Being a small, Mississippi owned company, it is seldom crowded and I felt like I would be safe going there for the few things I needed to pick up. I had seen pictures of empty shelves in large places like Wal-Mart and Kroger, but I was not prepared to see empty shelves at my little Corner Market. 

One of the items on my list was ground chuck. I was able to get the one small package that was left. The stocker told me to come back by and there might be a little more. When I went back, one woman was stacking up every single package of the limited amount now available and putting it in her cart. I went to look for the brand of tea I can drink and it too was all gone. I talked to sweet Mr. Doyle Martin from a safe distance, but missed my customary hug from him. There was no Jif Creamy peanut butter, so I headed on down the aisle. A group of older men was sitting close together and drinking coffee around a table. I stayed away from them. I sure hope they are being careful in other places! 

Fortunately, I am not completely out of the items I could not purchase today. And, sadly, I was not surprised at the actions of one woman grabbing every available package of an item, seemingly not caring if anyone else got any or not. I was a little surprised at the men around the table seeing as they were all obviously in the higher risk demographic. 

Compared to times like WWII, when people were asked to put their lives on the line, make many sacrifices, and do things for the common good, I honestly wonder if America could survive another World War. We have grown so selfish. If people who are able can't even do relatively simple things like social distancing or leaving anything for anyone else, could we pull together as a country the way people did during hard times of the past? 

As for me, I am going to do my best to keep my family and friends safe. I am going to check on my elderly friends who do not need to be out under any circumstances and get them what they need if possible. I am going to find not crowded outdoor spaces to get a little walking in. And, if I have it, and you need it, let me know. I'll share. 

Even my toilet paper. 

Immunosuppressed

I am what is known as immunosuppressed. I have to take steroids every day and will have to take them for the rest of my life. These steroids help keep me functioning and fill in the gaps of my faulty adrenal system. But, they also make me more susceptible to getting infections and illnesses. To complicate things, I also have a neuromuscular issue and asthma. 

I am not panicking. I am not buying up everyone's share of hand sanitizer or toilet paper. But, the good Lord gave me a brain and the ability to use it, for the most part. As a person more likely to get what is going around, I try to keep a safe distance between myself and anyone who appears to be ill with anything. 

The thing I am most concerned about, however, is the possibility of contracting COVID-19 and potentially passing it on to my more vulnerable or elderly friends. There is a good chance that I would recover. My friends, not so much. I have a surprising number of friends who are over 90 as well as quite a few over 80. I would not put them in jeopardy for the world. 

Yes, I am trying to keep a sense of humor about all this. I post funny stuff on Facebook. I did joke about stocking up on Girl Scout Cookies. But, I am keeping up with current information from reliable sources, and I know not to trivialize this by making it political. I also don't question the strength of my faith because I do take COVID-19 seriously. 

Stay well, everyone. 

Visiting Hours

I went to visit a friend today in the ICU. I was pleasantly surprised to find out that I could go in at any time I wanted and stay as long as the patient wanted me to be there. They now have "open" visiting hours. 

How I wish this had been the case when my mother was dying in the ICU at Vicksburg Hospital that Christmas night back in 1990. We got a strict 10 minutes on the hour. Only two people could go in at a time and they were supposed to be family. Mama was an only child, but no one at the hospital knew that. So, her dearest friends became her "sisters" in order for them to be allowed to visit Mama. 

That Christmas night, everyone knew that Mama was not going to make it. It would have been so much more humane to let us be with her for every precious second that she had left. About the last hour or so, they relented and finally let us come in and stay. It had to be enough. 

I firmly believe that the presence of loved ones, (as long as the patient is happy with that arrangement), is as crucial to recovery as medicine. Kudos to Merit Health River Region for getting on board with letting patients and families be together as much as possible, either for the purpose of getting the patient well, or allowing them time to say their goodbyes. 

I am thankful that in the future, we have that time. At least at Merit Health River Region. 

Letting Go, Hands Edition

Letting go is difficult for many of us. During our lifetimes, we are required to let many things go. We have to let go of hopes and dreams. Sometimes we have to let go of relationships. And we have to let go of THINGS. 

I am in the process of getting rid of art and craft supplies that I can simply no longer use. This is not because of a lack of desire to use them, but because of increased neuropathy, muscle weakness, and arthritis in my hands. 

This is proving to be harder than getting rid of other things. I can easily get rid of clothing I no longer want. I can, with some difficulty, get rid of books, CDs, and movies. I can get rid of kitchen items and dishes. 

But art supplies are another matter entirely! Not only am I getting rid of the supplies, but I am also getting rid of the creative hopes I had for them. One thing that makes this bearable is to give them to people who can still use them. 

So, I am working on getting rid of what I can no longer use to make room for the things that I still can do. 

But, I would be lying if I said it was easy. 

No Hat

As absolutely thrilled as I was to watch my beloved LSU Tigers win the National Championship, it was a bit bittersweet. For the first time, my Daddy was not here to watch it with me. I have no doubt that he was with me in spirit. I had his LSU sign propped up in front of my television along with an LSU Christmas ornament given to me by my sister with the words "All I want for Christmas is to win the Championship" printed on a small blackboard. 

Another thing that was strange was the fact that I was not immediately ordering Daddy an LSU Championship hat. The last hat I bought him was when LSU won the SEC in 2011 and I got him that hat. He was terminally ill that December and in the hospital. I took him his hat, and although, he never got to wear it, it was proudly displayed on a shelf on the little credenza in his hospital room. After Daddy passed away, I gave his other championship hats away. But, I still have that last one. I just could not part with it. 

I have people in my life who think watching football is silly. But, for me, college football is an enduring link to the Daddy I continue to miss terribly 8 years after his passing. When I cheer for the Tigers, I can almost hear my Daddy hollering at the TV for his beloved LSU. 

So, I will holler Geaux Tigers as long as I have the breath to do so. 

Thanks for the memories, Daddy. 

Snoozing People

In my quest to enjoy a generally more upbeat and peaceful Facebook feed in 2020, I am spending some time "snoozing" or "unfollowing" some folks. I am not "unfriending" or "blocking." I can go see their feeds at my leisure. But, I am just no longer up to a daily barrage of unsubstantiated political garbage, deliberate unkindness, lack of understanding or tolerance for other races of people, etc. I am not talking about people who occasionally post things I don't care for, but those who post things like this nonstop to the exclusion of much of anything else. 

I want to see cute pictures of your children and grandchildren. I want to hear about the good things that are happening in your lives. I want to celebrate weddings and births with you. I want to be able to pray with and for you if you should lose a loved one or suffer a serious illness. I want to encourage you. And, I try very hard to post something every day that gives you a chuckle or even a belly laugh! 

I love to stay connected to people. Facebook gives me a way to keep up with friends and relatives who live far away. I'm not willing to give it up at this point. There are three little dots at the top right-hand corner of each post. They give you the options to snooze or unfollow. 

You might want to do a little snoozing yourself. 

Happy New Year! 

December Reflections

Just some random musings about this December so far. 

This has been a very tough year for many of my friends and extended family members. So many have lost loved ones, endured illness both physically and emotionally, and dealt with losses of jobs and income. I lost a friend this year at the too-young age of 56. We used to sing together with another dear friend. One of our last performances was of "Hey Santa!" for a company Christmas gathering in Memphis. I heard that song for the first time this season and it was a poignant moment and another realization that I won't sing with Mary again until we meet in Heaven. 

On happier notes, I have had a wonderful time "doing art" with the children at Micah's Mission. These kids are an inspiration and just a joy to be around. We made some really cool picture frames and designed our own gift wrap and Christmas cards. Check them out here:
 https://www.facebook.com/micahsmissionschool/ 

I am about to head out on what has become an annual trip to North Mississippi and Memphis. I visit friends in Water Valley, Oxford, and Southaven. On Friday, I will attend the Christmas Concert of the Memphis Camerata, which includes my friend Teresa. This is always a lovely occasion. 

https://www.facebook.com/Camerata901/

Then I will zoom back home to prepare for our last service of the year at Hermanville United Methodist Church. It has been different this past 6 months with only having services two Sundays a month, but those services have been a blessing, for me at least. I help out at a local retirement home on one of the "off Sundays." These Sundays contain great lessons presented by my friend, Sarah and I love coordinating music and singing with these residents. I come away feeling sufficiently "churched" on those Sundays. The other Sunday, I often spend at home, just enjoying a peaceful morning. I no longer see anything wrong with this.

https://www.facebook.com/HermanvilleUnitedMethodistChurch/

On another happy note, LSU won the SEC Championship! I know that a lot of folks think football is silly, but LSU football has always been a link to my Daddy. I was born at Baton Rouge General at the height of Football season in 1959 while Daddy was getting his Engineering degree from LSU. I was born a Tiger fan. Last time we won the SEC, Daddy was in the hospital, dying of cancer. I bought the SEC Championship hat for him and took it to the hospital where we displayed it on his corner shelf. Seeing LSU do well brings back happy memories of my Daddy and I won't apologize for being extra happy to see how well they have done this season!

December has historically been a tough month for me and my family. But, I am more determined than ever to make it the best one possible this year. I hope you can too. 

Humor

I often joke that I have the sense of humor of an 11-year-old boy. Often, I have come across slightly rude things that have made me absolutely collapse in giggles, but I have been afraid to post them. After all, I am a 60-year-old woman, and one would think my sense of humor would have become more sophisticated over time. Wrong! 

I am not a fan of totally slapstick comedy. The Stooges don't do it for me at all. But, give me Abbott and Costello's "Who's on First" routine and I laugh every time. Old Victor Borge routines tickle me to death. I loved Danny Kaye. Today's profanity-laced, NSFW humor just escapes me. 

The other day, I decided to "out" my unsophisticated self and I posted this picture on Facebook. As of this writing, 67 people had reacted to it. There are obviously more people who appreciate this type of humor than I thought. 

These days, I appreciate anything that gives me a belly laugh. 

I hope you do too. 

Feeding Critters, Part 2

This is my husband's little buddy. He comes up to the step right before the landing of our back doorstep to get his breakfast every morning. At first, he would disappear down his hole and he might not be seen for the rest of the day. 

However, Mr.Chipmunk must have decided to read The Hobbit. He now comes back a couple of hours after his breakfast looking quite pitiful. So, Bill began feeding him a "second breakfast." At least he does not seem to expect lunch! The total sum of what he gets is about one walnut half. After that, he seems content. 

Of course, if the neighbor dogs see Bill go out and feed the chipmunk, they begin barking for THEIR treats. And, usually, my husband obliges with the doggie treats we keep, although we have no dog of our own. 

When we went to Seashore Assembly last week, I was too sick to want to do much of anything. So, I sat and watched the squirrels and the water. Bill, wanting to see how close the squirrels would come to us, bought a jar of unsalted peanuts and began feeding THEM too! I am sure that, given time, they might even eat out of Bill's hand. 

Maybe I need to start a "Go Fund" to help cover the cost of all the nuts my husband feeds any available critters.

Bill, the critter feeder. 

It has a nice ring, don't you think? 

The Big 6-0

The Birthday week countdown has begun. Yes, I said birthday WEEK. I plan to celebrate (at least a little!) every day this week. 

Yesterday, my brother and sister took me out to breakfast for my annual siblings' birthday gathering. I expected to see THEM. I did NOT expect to see my friend, Teresa, (from Southaven) who had been cleverly hidden by another dear friend who is known to most everyone these days as "Granna." I am told my squeal was heard even outside the confines of the restaurant! Teresa has been hard at work attending school to learn medical coding. I had no idea that she would be able to come down for the occasion. I told my family not to do that for my next milestone. I will be so old, I might have a heart attack and drop dead!

I was also treated to the most amazing lemon bars that I have ever eaten and they are GLUTEN-FREE! I will definitely be stopping at Butter, A Louisiana Bakery, next time I am in Monroe. Thanks to my sister, Tammy, for finding this place and agreeing to make the sacrifice of sampling items so I would know what was good. Tough job, but someone had to do it!

The only thing I did not get was a picture with my brother and sister. My brother had a pressing event to get to after my party. A young friend of his was turning the big "4" and he left my party to attend hers. 

I guess I'm ready for the old rocking chair now. 

And maybe a nap. 

Hospitality

The other day I was thinking about my favorite great-aunt. Aunt Emma Lee has been gone for a number of years, but I still miss her. 

My grandmother would take me down to Kentwood, LA every summer to stay with Aunt Emma Lee. I would play with my cousins and visit with all the other great-aunts and uncles while I was there. And, usually, our stay would involve at least one big meal with as many of the family present as could be there. 

Aunt Emma Lee was the most amazing cook and hostess. She had reared 4 boys, all of whom had played football, and she knew how to cook for a hungry crowd. My mouth still waters when I remember her delicious chicken pot pie. It would literally melt in my mouth and I can't remember a time that I didn't ask for seconds. 

Most of all, Aunt Emma Lee was a gracious hostess. I never went to her house where I was not offered food and drink and a comfortable place to sit (preferably in the porch swing). Aunt Emma Lee loved having company and bent over backward to make sure everyone was taken care of. 

I don't have the crowds of people coming to my house, and I don't do much cooking from scratch anymore. But, true to my deep Southern roots, if you come to my house, you are going to be offered a cool beverage, something to eat, and the most comfortable place I can find for you to sit. 

Just let me know you are on your way.