Wednesday, October 17, 2018

Don't put up those shorts!

As usual, Mississippi has gone straight from Summer to almost Winter in the blink of an eye, sending us scrambling for the long pants and jackets we had stashed behind the capris and T-shirts. There was no gentle glide into Fall-like temps with maybe needing a light jacket after sundown or a lightweight, long-sleeved shirt during the day. Not in Mississippi. 

Anyone who has lived here very long also knows not to stash those Summer clothes too far away. We may very well need those shorts, t-shirts, and sandals at Thanksgiving. Or even Christmas. I hear people from other states talk about putting away their Summer clothes for the Winter. My Summer clothes are never far away. 

The same goes for Winter clothes. I remember a Summer when I was in grad school the first time around where I actually needed a sweater in June. So, it is not really safe to put all the Winter clothes away either. Of course, we have had some Winters where I never really wore what most would call Winter clothes. 

Buyers for our local stores don't seem to get Mississippi. Heavy wool clothes are out in showrooms in August when we are sweating to death and can't even imagine cooler temperatures. And most of the things are going to be too heavy for all but maybe 3 of our coldest days? Some of those buyers need to spend a year down here! 

I have heard the saying all my life "If you don't like the weather in Mississippi, give it a minute, it will change." The same goes for my wardrobe!

I'm sure none of my friends have ever gone from 90 to 55 when they saw a State Trooper. As for me...I'll never tell! 

Sunday, October 07, 2018

Mocked

Merriam-Webster defines mock as to "treat with contempt or ridicule." 

This past week, I have heard survivors of sexual assault mocked, joked about, derided, and scorned. This was not just about Dr. Blasey Ford. This was an assault on all survivors.

On social media, everyone becomes an "expert." I wanted to scream when I heard people (who I know are not counselors or psychologists) profess to know exactly how a survivor should remember incidents in perfect detail. In reality, (I am a retired licensed professional counselor) it is not unusual for memories to be fragmented and incomplete. I saw this in my own practice as well as in my own life as a survivor. 

Don't even get me started on the memes about being terrified that boys will be falsely accused and have their lives ruined. Statistically, fewer than 5% of rape accusations are fabricated. 

When tRump mocked Dr. Blasey Ford at the rally in Mississippi, I wanted to reach through the TV and slap him silly. And I wanted to slap the people cheering and clapping behind him. Especially the women! How can they turn on their fellow women like that? 

Personally, I am deeply disappointed in some people I used to at least call casual friends and one or two that I felt were close friends. I honestly hope I never see them again. And there are some local people who I hope I never meet face to face. I don't need these kinds of people in my life. 

I did not tell my story until 16 years later when I went to counseling after the death of my mother. If I told my story now, would I be similarly mocked by these people? After all, the evidence was washed away that night or healed over time.

I have no proof but my word. 

And, apparently, that would mean little to some folks. 




Bah Humbug?

  I was messaging with a friend today and she said that she had some "Bah Humbug" going on, but she did not know why. That got me ...